Short Summary of Tea

I met a guy on an online community, six years ago. I'll call him Tea, for I'm Lady Grey...
I was a teenager, I hadn't any experience about love affairs (this doesn't means that now I have a lot of it!), but I was sure I'd never fall in love with a guy known on the web.
So we were just kidding when we talked about wedding and I was also engaged with a wonderful boy of my town. During the early months I told him sweet stupid things, just referred to the online role game, but I was thinking of my boyfriend. And he too, he loved flirting with me on the messenger, but I thought he was kidding like me. So, even if he was charming, his words only maked me smile.
I went away from my town for holidays (it was a new experience for me, I'll explain this next times), Tea tried to reach me because I was relatively near to his home, but he failed. From that moment I strated feeling that the idea of don't seeing Tea was sader that the missing of my boyfriend. I found that I didn't miss anybody, and when I came back home I had no lust for seeing them.
From that moment I wrote sweet things to my boyfriend taking inspiration from my new, unexplainable love. After a while I drop him off.

Me and Tea chatted till 5 a.m. every night, he opened me a new world with his points of view and I surprised him by showing my eternal happiness; he was also amazed of how I could understand his needs, I couldn't reach him, we lived far from each other, so I understood that he couldn't wait for me for too long time. I know someone could think that Love is strictly linked to Waiting, but he didn't think it, and neither did I. That was also my strenght.
He told me about all his girlfriends, I felt like dying everytime but after their relationship (and sometimes also During their relationship) he came back to me. I never felt like a supply and you could see it like a mistake, but I know he never lied to me and he really felt what he said. And moreover, every girl disappeared from his thoughts after a few time, while I was proud of being in his mind for five, long years.
Since the last year I don't feel him involved, he's passed a bad time and I've no more the spontaneous mood he loved, so I'm enable to confide in him and that's why I'm writing here.

I must add that now I've got another wonderful partner (let's call him Lego, there will be time to explain this too) who partially knows my feelings for Tea and he accepts them, and he falled head over heels for me. I think he's the best boyfriend for me but I'm too desperately tied to my past and my regrets to surrender.
Even if I'm no more the woman he wants, I still think about wedding Tea, one day.